Porn Star Mentality

I tried to find some glittery, sweaty looking text but all I could muster was black. I just can't find a suitable font to go with my Porn Star title. Its OK though because porn stars play it safe. Say what you like about their choice of careers, they are ethically and morally straight. Never mind their influence on society, or the first impression your sweet grandmother is going to get (if she doesn't have a heart attack) when you bring home your new boyfriend or girlfriend, they are sure things. Take that as you will.

Unlike the majority of the population, it seems that porn stars are frequently checking themselves for STDs. (Prevent STDs Like a Porn Star ) This seems a little backward. I mean, I'm glad they are keeping there very exposed nether regions squeaky clean, but why isn't the rest of the world? Is it because we're not porn stars, therefore we obviously don't carry STDs. That's not it. At least I hope you don't think that's it because I'm living in Chlamydia City! Not me personally, but my little fly speck on the state is a Chlamydia campground. Go ahead and vomit, but its true. And it doesn't really matter anyway because the CDC isn't worried. Maybe its Saturday's big rapture that has them spiral brained, or maybe..... *whispers* they're zombies!

It seems obvious enough to me that its too late for us all. Forget AIDS or Chlamydia. Forget the rapture. Forget tsunamis, earthquakes or asteroids. We're dealing with ZOMBIES!! The CDC has released their recommendations on how to deal with a zombie apocalypse. If you were ever concerned about where your tax dollars are going, fret no more. You are in good hands. Just make sure you have water, duct tape, a flashlight, a knife, bedding, a stockpile of food, and don't get your brains eaten.


www.demotivationalposters.org

The clock is ticking people. Pick your poison, and party like a porn star!